Don't worry about the moment if it is negative and unpleasent but not that serious.
Dont drag the last moment into the next. Release the feelings by not paying attention to them.
Cultivate present moment awareness. In order to be happy physically, we must be happy spiritually.
Yesterday, The author of Quirkology was talking about being aware. If you are in deep thought or concentration on something, you lose sight of other things. Its like selective surveying of our environment. We make assumptions of everything every day because it is not possible for our minds to relearn every little thing. You assume that for instance it is cold outside becasue someone out your window has a coat on. Instead of going outside to feel the cold and having to waste time surveying the tempurature, your brain makes assumptions based on observation. The problem lies when we make assumptions about things that are not important or we do it too often. Anyway, a study was done where ppl had to look at a tape on basketball players. they had to count how many times the ball was passed. While focusing on this, they totally missed the gorilla that stepped onto the court and beat his chest. Focus focus focus. When there was a competition or extra pressure, only 5% saw the gorilla, versus an average of 10%.
Yesterday night I was helping a friend about someone that has anxiety. I explained to her for about an hour how to deal with her, what its like in her head and how to help her if she so chooses. Basically a lot of the things I said I ended up watching on tv the next day. Not word for word, but Its apparent this guy had some mental problems and learned how not to worry or become depressed.
Today I am watching Mr Jose Villegas III and he is basically explaining the same things that i said to my friend. We think a lot and our attention/mind can only be focused on one thing. He says "present moment awareness" is what is important to focus on every day. Anyway, back to our mind and its capacity of focus. We can either focus on thoughts or the momoent, Our thoughts can be ruled by emotions and if we focus too much, then thats when my anxiety kicks in. Be focused on the moment. To me, thats usually when I stop whatever I am doing, take a deep breath, and look around me. Look at the thing on the wall, look at my hands and just observe things. It allows my mind to reset and stop thinking and spiral with bad thoughts fueled by emotions that may not even be founded.
He says once you start judging people you actually judging yourself because you are using yourself as a basis. I specifically said that to my friend b/c sometimes when I drive, i get hyper about when people cut me off or drive not to my liking. I realized i was doing that because I was creating anger and rage unnecessarily because I was holding every driver on the road to the standards that I created for myself. These standards are not set in stone, but they work for me. I dont realize there are more than way to do things so other driving styles work. Plus I am creating this insanely ruley and focused environment and unnecessarily and unfairly holding other people to thoose standards.
What is interesting to me is that I am sitting here worried about school and how I need this and how I need that degree, says who? Well im putting all this pressure on myself for no reason! If i am meant to be successful at what I like, degree or not, I will be successful. And how am I defining the word successful? I successfully was able to share my experiences of anxiety with a friend. I didn't need to go to school for that? Plus here is this man, who looks pretty much successful, he is on televison sharing his experiences of God and reaching out to countless people on knowledge on what he calls "Emotional prison". Who is to say he is not successful, degree or not. I bet I could probably find a similar career without finishing my degree. It's like what I was tellign my friend yesterday anyway, I was not satisfied with my other job and I decided to start school and that appeased my dissatisfaction. I figured I go to school and earn a degree towards psychology and that should give me some control. I am in an entirely different profession and it would be very difficult (how would I know??) to just jump into another profession. I basically put paint on a rusty car. I'm dropping out of my Childhood and Family Development class. Too much pressure.
I feel like I make decissions that sounded good at the time, but then when the luster wears off, i realized the real motive behind it and I've duped myself. Why?!
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