Monday, April 14, 2008

Crazy Dream

I'm supposed to be doing my homework. In fact, I only have 29 more minutes to wrap up a chapter, but i keep thinking about my dreams. So sad that they're more comforting than the real world.

Sometimes I wish my imagination wasn't so vivid and adaptive so that I wouldn't want to sleep so much, but then I'm greatful because sometimes the conscious world doesn't even give me the emotions i experience in my dreams.

My dreams are so crazy in that I can literally be anybody in the world. I can dream I am the president and I swear, I could tell you his deepest thoughts and fears. two nights ago I dreamt that my sister was neglectful in that she let a situation go from bad to worse. In the end, I wsa some white lady married to a man, and through the mishap of my sis, she allowed a crazy man to kill our only son. He was 4. Although this would be one of the most traumatic moments in my life, just being in the loving comforting arms of my husband, I felt at ease, I knew nothing would go wrong because we had each other and I was protected from any and all. Just to know that he would be by my side throughout it all, made all the pain go away. It was such a theraputic dream. I woke up thinking I WAS married! Crazyness...

And then last night I had a dream that I ws in an apartment building with narrow staircases and some ppl were shooting at each other above and below me. To get out the way of the bullets, I tried to straddle myself between the stairwell (the part you look down, in the middle) Well, I got shot anyway!!

In the stomach. Only one that I knew of at first: two inches down and 3 inches to the right of my belly button. I was medevac'd (medically evacuated) to a surgical unit. Well, i actually was shot 2wice more: 1 inch down and 1 inch to the left of my belly button, and the last one significantly to the right side. It didn't hurt. It didn't bleed. but I touched it, I could see and feel the edges of the wounds as I looked down at my stomach. I was still walking around. The doctor wasnt in any rush and neither was I. It was weird because I was afraid of how long it would take for me to tell my mom if I needed a colostomy bag. The odds weren't on my side because of the amount of times I was shot in the general area: my intestines. I do remember getting very concerned for myself near the end because I didn't want to get an infection. I didn't even get to have surgery. I just woke up.

It was so real and weird!! All day i kept thinking to myself at work: "I got shot in my stomach... I wonder how many people would think I'm insane if I said that or even explained my dream."

6 comments:

quarter-life-crisis said...

I am the same way. Ever since I was a little girl I have had 2 lives:
1. My actually one
2. The one in my head
I day dream from the moment I wake up until I go to bed at night. Anything can trigger it. Currently in my imaginary life I am a singer on Bad Boy label who is going with Kanye West!!! I have seriously been living in this fantasy for over a year and a half.
WOW!! This is the first time I have express myself about it. Basically know you are not by yourself!! LOL

sweetpea said...

Wow, I'm happy I'm not alone! I tell myself there are two worlds the wake world and the dream world. I swear it's so real, I could step into it like a portal on that Stargate show.

Girl, I would listen to you tell me about your imaginary life for DAYS!! I think it's so interesting! Dreams are so much more interesting because there are no boundaries.

Do you find that you have a lot of disturbing dreams and daydreams too?

quarter-life-crisis said...

I think my day dreams (or imaginary life) is more about me doing things I would not do in real life. So its me being more outgoing. As far as me having disturbing dreams and daydreams, I have them also. I sometimes picture people close to me dying and wondering how I will react to it. Or me actually dying and seeing how my death will affect these individuals. The one that scares me the most is where I harm someone.

As for as my relationship with Kanye and fabulous career as a pop star, I can go on for days. It really triggers when I am listening to music.

Torrance Stephens bka All-Mi-T said...

dang is all i can say. hope u dont mind the comment

quarter-life-crisis said...

Hello? Hope school is not wearing you out.

Michelle Reed said...

LOL @ "woke up thinking I WAS married!" Yes, I've had the dream about the gunshots - I actually smelt the smoke and everything.

Also had dreams with symbols and knew who was going to have a baby, die, miscarriage etc. I'd dream of places I'd never been and then be in that place a few months later - no joke! Now that I've read your post I'll probably have some mad dream tonight to raaah.

I used to pray to God that He'd stop the dreams, and they did go away for a while.

Now I just let them come because there is a reason for them. Well, I can relate because sometimes I wish my dreams weren't so lucid as well.

Thanks for writing about this.