Chillin, sittin on my blu couch sippin on some Sangria...
Oh so grateful that I am OUT of school! This semester was one of the hardest!
I knew i would make it, but gawd dawg, if it wasn't a struggle!
Maintainin that A grade...
I finished my finals Friday and Saturday, then celebrated at my friends Bachelorette Party!
I needed that release...
Showing posts with label school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label school. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Instead of feeling like a complete idiot for not understanding the material in my ECON 100 class, I will admit that I have a lot going on and that i don't think I have time to study as thoroughly as I should. I dont because i don't get it and I think studying math is more beneficial. Math doesn't have multiple choice questions, so i have a higher chance of guessing the right answer in economics tests.
I cannot wait until i am done with this marathon then i will have time to study like i should be, versus waking up so friggin early on saturday mornings to run 5-10 miles. THat just kills the rest of the day because after using that much energy, all i am good for is stuffing my face trying to replenish those calories lost and sleeping because I am exhausted. plus running to the gym every other day for 1 1/2 hours where as i could be studying instead. 3 classes isn't a lot. i just need to do better time management.
I will be alright. everything will be okay. i will pass Economics.
I cannot wait until i am done with this marathon then i will have time to study like i should be, versus waking up so friggin early on saturday mornings to run 5-10 miles. THat just kills the rest of the day because after using that much energy, all i am good for is stuffing my face trying to replenish those calories lost and sleeping because I am exhausted. plus running to the gym every other day for 1 1/2 hours where as i could be studying instead. 3 classes isn't a lot. i just need to do better time management.
I will be alright. everything will be okay. i will pass Economics.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
You gotta have F-A-I-T-H!!!
people would rather see you suffer in your quest for the existence of God than to free you of your mental war and tell you that you can believe anything you want. Not just because it is against their religion to denounce God.
Maybe for a bit, your questioning and prodding for proof almost awakened that small ounce of doubt in their own minds that they've struggled with in the past. They've successfully buried it with all other "poisonous thoughts" for so long. That is not a fond trip down memory lane.
So their adamantly strong hard-headed tactics, while abrasive and one-sided to you, may seem like it is meant to attack you, it is also to save someone of their sanity. Save them of slipping back into one of the most feared, troubling and terrifying mind games someone can experience, especially after being taught by everyone that He does exist.
Just a hint of doubt in anyone, especially the Church, your mama and Grandma, feels like betrayal in the highest degree. It causes you to look over your shoulder for that stray rain cloud carrying the lightning bolt that will signal your demise and your failure in the true game of Life.
Maybe for a bit, your questioning and prodding for proof almost awakened that small ounce of doubt in their own minds that they've struggled with in the past. They've successfully buried it with all other "poisonous thoughts" for so long. That is not a fond trip down memory lane.
So their adamantly strong hard-headed tactics, while abrasive and one-sided to you, may seem like it is meant to attack you, it is also to save someone of their sanity. Save them of slipping back into one of the most feared, troubling and terrifying mind games someone can experience, especially after being taught by everyone that He does exist.
Just a hint of doubt in anyone, especially the Church, your mama and Grandma, feels like betrayal in the highest degree. It causes you to look over your shoulder for that stray rain cloud carrying the lightning bolt that will signal your demise and your failure in the true game of Life.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Some thoughts
So whats the difference between our citizens of the past and now? more and more time is dedicated to entertainment and leisure. Before there was such a rampant amount of technology, innovation, novel ideas and inventions, we were all in the dark: literally and figuratively. You worked from sun up to sun down. You didn't do too much complaining about what you did or didnt have because you didn't know that your neighbor, cousin, brother, had it worse or better than you. Plus back then we were self-sufficient. We had wants and needs. We did what we needed to get what we wanted. (sidebar: when was debt invented? Probably when slavery was.)
O
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Now with technology, everything is laid out in our laps. Our world has grown smaller with each newscast of China, or blog of Iraq. We are more aware of our neighbors over the Atlantic then we were with our next-door neighbor.
Back then our economy was geared towards manufacturing and industrial, but now with technology, those jobs are of the past. We have computers that run machines. That gives us the luxury of working in the service and information dominated economy. The luxuries include more time to spend with family or just to do leisure things, because technology not only solved the question of who's going to do the back breaking laborious job, but also streamlined all other jobs. Face it, typing an email to someone has considerably cut down numbers at the Post Office.
O
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O
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Now with technology, everything is laid out in our laps. Our world has grown smaller with each newscast of China, or blog of Iraq. We are more aware of our neighbors over the Atlantic then we were with our next-door neighbor.
Back then our economy was geared towards manufacturing and industrial, but now with technology, those jobs are of the past. We have computers that run machines. That gives us the luxury of working in the service and information dominated economy. The luxuries include more time to spend with family or just to do leisure things, because technology not only solved the question of who's going to do the back breaking laborious job, but also streamlined all other jobs. Face it, typing an email to someone has considerably cut down numbers at the Post Office.
O
<^>
/\
Most people argue, though, that technology hasn't in fact helped out as much as we thought it did. We are still busy, if not busier than say, 50 years ago. People were enthused with the possibility of computers taking over a lot of things, but no one factored in the maintenance of our society as a whole. Humans are still needed to make decisions, come up with innovative ideas, solve problems and be leaders and mentors to each other.
Most people argue, though, that technology hasn't in fact helped out as much as we thought it did. We are still busy, if not busier than say, 50 years ago. People were enthused with the possibility of computers taking over a lot of things, but no one factored in the maintenance of our society as a whole. Humans are still needed to make decisions, come up with innovative ideas, solve problems and be leaders and mentors to each other.
O
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Then what happens when scientist finally crack the code of human intelligence? When computers are finally programmed to think on their own. Do we really think that life will be even easier? There will still be our core issues. Our problems will evolve into other things and the process will start all over again.
O
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Then what happens when scientist finally crack the code of human intelligence? When computers are finally programmed to think on their own. Do we really think that life will be even easier? There will still be our core issues. Our problems will evolve into other things and the process will start all over again.
O
<^>
/\
I wonder if our ancestors, or just maybe 100 year ago those people had a chance to live in our world. I think they would have a mixture of joy and horror. All the beneficial and productive things, but the demoralizing issues. I wonder if they would think that all the advances of the human race are not worth the effort because of all the new devastation that wasn't an issue back then.
I wonder if our ancestors, or just maybe 100 year ago those people had a chance to live in our world. I think they would have a mixture of joy and horror. All the beneficial and productive things, but the demoralizing issues. I wonder if they would think that all the advances of the human race are not worth the effort because of all the new devastation that wasn't an issue back then.
O
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Is technology worth it in the end? Is technology focused on the wrong things? Instead of trying to be the first company to invent a computer that can do this or that, how about an idea to combat poverty, pollution, crime, sexism and racism. I realize inthe scientific world our focus is on military, medicinal etc issues. A large part of that focus falls into creature comforts as well. When will we decide that the priority is our children and our seniors, the disabled and uneducated. Instead of ensuring everyone in their house has a television equipped to handle the move from analog to digital cable, how about we ensure all children have 3 squares, a bed to sleep in, and the promise to be safe from abuse.
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Is technology worth it in the end? Is technology focused on the wrong things? Instead of trying to be the first company to invent a computer that can do this or that, how about an idea to combat poverty, pollution, crime, sexism and racism. I realize inthe scientific world our focus is on military, medicinal etc issues. A large part of that focus falls into creature comforts as well. When will we decide that the priority is our children and our seniors, the disabled and uneducated. Instead of ensuring everyone in their house has a television equipped to handle the move from analog to digital cable, how about we ensure all children have 3 squares, a bed to sleep in, and the promise to be safe from abuse.
O
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Has technology dictated our values or have our values dictated technology?
O
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Monday, March 31, 2008
I'm stressed
This is my 69th post. Just thought I'd mention that ;-)
Most people have tons of memories of their childhoods, good and bad. We can almost always relate some of our current actions and reasonings for doing things to memories where our parents influenced us. Some serious, some not-so-serious. Some healthy, some unhealthy.
One of my healthy habits I can relate to childhood is the fact that I like to eat a colorful diet. My mom didn't really follow nutritional guidlines to a T: it's kind of difficult to do that when you're more focused on buying enough groceries for the amount of foodstamps you have for the month. But what she did explain to me was to keep your plate colorful. Just eating all bland-colored food is usually unhealty(white, beige, brown) and veggies and fruit are a great way to colorize your plate instantly!! See: a healthy habit from a childhood memory!
One of my unhealthy habits is my way of dealing with stress. Although ultimately I don't seem to have control over exactly what I stress over, I don't deal with it properly. I remember one time as a child I had a conversation with my mom that has help mold that habit.
I remember as a kid telling my mom one day that I thought I was depressed. Now, I'm pretty sure I wasn't depressed, just really sad! I mean if I realized just how poor we really were, I imagine I would have truely been depressed but I was one of those oblivious kids. Just all innocent and spaced out in my own world. I probably heard the word being used on TV or something, because as you know, that word isn't used in the black community (sadly). Back to the conversation: my mom got soooo mad at me! By the way, I must have been about 10. Maybe younger. I understand I probably didn't understand the context that i used that word and what she should have done was point me to the right word and see just what the fcuk her daughter was "depressed" about. What could possibly be the problem, right?
Wrong! She gave me attitude. My mother explained that I wasn't depressed and that I didn't know what it meant to be depressed. She literally gave me attitude like I was maybe ungrateful of being an innocent child. I felt a vibe similar to a short impatient temper on her part maybe because she felt she was or should be the one depressed because she's got a family of 5 to take after, a husband that she constantly fights with, money issues blah blah blah, you get the hint. Irregardless (i love that made-up word), I felt bad for feeling depressed, sad whatever you want to call it, because somebody I love just may have it worse.
So my unhealthy habit is (actually, i have a 2fer on this one) 1)Stress and get apprehensive to talk about it to others 2)Feel bad for complaining. I am sure I am not the only one. I wasn't necessarily raised specifically to be strong, but inadvertently it's what has help molded me to be the way I am. Now, I said all that to say I AM STRESSED.
I am not depressed, but I have a lot on my plate. I want to talk about it, but then I feel like I sound like I'm complaining or whining. But if I don't let some steam off pretty soon, I am going to crash. I honestly don't see an end to my stress for about a month, but I can't take it physically! My neck is all tight, I'm starting to get headaches at the slightest problems, and I get all fever-like. I'm grinding my teeth at night. I feel like butsting out in tears at the smallest things: Unicef commercials... St Judes commercials, Animal Precint, I can't even listen to love songs anymore. I'm stuck listening to talk radio!
I probably just need a few good cries. I think I may watch The Color Purple just to get the tears started.
I honestly envy my friends because after a good talk with me which usually lasts an hour or so, some of them say "I feel better!" I WANT THAT a nonjudgemental person that understands that they don't have to relate to me or solve my problems, but to just listen and know that they care. I need new friends. No, I just need to talk to Jesus more... well, I just have to listen to Him more and stop worrying (which technically isn't a sin, but sinful nonetheless... does that make sense?)
Most people have tons of memories of their childhoods, good and bad. We can almost always relate some of our current actions and reasonings for doing things to memories where our parents influenced us. Some serious, some not-so-serious. Some healthy, some unhealthy.
One of my healthy habits I can relate to childhood is the fact that I like to eat a colorful diet. My mom didn't really follow nutritional guidlines to a T: it's kind of difficult to do that when you're more focused on buying enough groceries for the amount of foodstamps you have for the month. But what she did explain to me was to keep your plate colorful. Just eating all bland-colored food is usually unhealty(white, beige, brown) and veggies and fruit are a great way to colorize your plate instantly!! See: a healthy habit from a childhood memory!
One of my unhealthy habits is my way of dealing with stress. Although ultimately I don't seem to have control over exactly what I stress over, I don't deal with it properly. I remember one time as a child I had a conversation with my mom that has help mold that habit.
I remember as a kid telling my mom one day that I thought I was depressed. Now, I'm pretty sure I wasn't depressed, just really sad! I mean if I realized just how poor we really were, I imagine I would have truely been depressed but I was one of those oblivious kids. Just all innocent and spaced out in my own world. I probably heard the word being used on TV or something, because as you know, that word isn't used in the black community (sadly). Back to the conversation: my mom got soooo mad at me! By the way, I must have been about 10. Maybe younger. I understand I probably didn't understand the context that i used that word and what she should have done was point me to the right word and see just what the fcuk her daughter was "depressed" about. What could possibly be the problem, right?
Wrong! She gave me attitude. My mother explained that I wasn't depressed and that I didn't know what it meant to be depressed. She literally gave me attitude like I was maybe ungrateful of being an innocent child. I felt a vibe similar to a short impatient temper on her part maybe because she felt she was or should be the one depressed because she's got a family of 5 to take after, a husband that she constantly fights with, money issues blah blah blah, you get the hint. Irregardless (i love that made-up word), I felt bad for feeling depressed, sad whatever you want to call it, because somebody I love just may have it worse.
So my unhealthy habit is (actually, i have a 2fer on this one) 1)Stress and get apprehensive to talk about it to others 2)Feel bad for complaining. I am sure I am not the only one. I wasn't necessarily raised specifically to be strong, but inadvertently it's what has help molded me to be the way I am. Now, I said all that to say I AM STRESSED.
I am not depressed, but I have a lot on my plate. I want to talk about it, but then I feel like I sound like I'm complaining or whining. But if I don't let some steam off pretty soon, I am going to crash. I honestly don't see an end to my stress for about a month, but I can't take it physically! My neck is all tight, I'm starting to get headaches at the slightest problems, and I get all fever-like. I'm grinding my teeth at night. I feel like butsting out in tears at the smallest things: Unicef commercials... St Judes commercials, Animal Precint, I can't even listen to love songs anymore. I'm stuck listening to talk radio!
I probably just need a few good cries. I think I may watch The Color Purple just to get the tears started.
I honestly envy my friends because after a good talk with me which usually lasts an hour or so, some of them say "I feel better!" I WANT THAT a nonjudgemental person that understands that they don't have to relate to me or solve my problems, but to just listen and know that they care. I need new friends. No, I just need to talk to Jesus more... well, I just have to listen to Him more and stop worrying (which technically isn't a sin, but sinful nonetheless... does that make sense?)
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Onwards and upwards
I quit I quit I qui-it!! (to be sung in the tune of "Ring around the rosies")
So far so good!! I put my two weeks in on Monday, I also started school on Monday as well.
So I would say in about a month, my stress levels will go back to normal... after I get settled in the new job and I get the hang of school! Things are going well!
So far so good!! I put my two weeks in on Monday, I also started school on Monday as well.
So I would say in about a month, my stress levels will go back to normal... after I get settled in the new job and I get the hang of school! Things are going well!
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